Feeling Kinda Mushy

Ahhh Great Date.  I’m still reelin, in a good way.  🙂

I spent the afternoon and evening Saturday with Great Date on our long longed for and finally arrived first overnight.  He and his gal just hadn’t done that yet, and I was pretty honored to be the first.  I went over and hung a little while with Great Date and his gal, really enjoying the conversation and then we went to the University District.  Hours disappeared walking and talking and drinking coffee.  Our conversations just trip me out, how they flow from laughs to hurts to deep shit to giggles.  God I really love.. er.. LIKE this complex man.  🙂

He’s so damned.. awesome.  So supportive and sexy and funny and smart and just.. wonderful.  I’m feeling a little mush today.  I just keep smiling.

I should let you in on an astonishing little secret too.. uh.. seven times.  SEVEN TIMES last night and once this morning he rocked my goddamned world.  This alone would leave me giddy, but that he played excellent music, really talked to me, snuggled me, supported me, and understood…. ohhhhhhh.. my.  I think I finally have NRE, but the good kind.  We talked about this actually.  We have the slow building good kind of NRE.  The kind where you aren’t rushing to get everything in because you kind of feel like this is something real, something that will be around.  It doesn’t have the desperate edge NRE has sometimes.  It’s, well, it’s good.  No, it’s kinda great.  In typical me fashion I could not find words, so I just told him “mushy.  I’m feeling mushy”.

Then today I had coffee with ForensicGuy and his gal.  It was good.  It was a little awkward for me in moments because I was unsure honestly how to act.  It stems from the kinda.. odd friendship I have with him and with his gal’s clear knowledge of every detail.. which kind of surprised me.  We are not dating, are clearly and decisively not dating, and are friends, but there is interest there and there’s been a little blurring of lines.  I simply CAN’T date another person, but I do like our friendship and if I’m honest.. our blurry lines.  It doesn’t help me keep things clear that he’s a Dom and that we talk pretty much all day long.  We all went to a poly potluck then and I was happy to meet some really normal seeming poly folks and to talk about communication.  Good times.

On my way there, I talked with Hubby and then with Roller Girl.  She had a shitty weekend and a lot of drama caused by her ex, Kinky Boy and her mom.  It was a lot to deal with and I was happy hubby had been there to support her.  I just kept offering support, which is really all we can do for the stuff she is dealing with.  In her compromised state, she told me “I do love you, *cough* just saying”.  In my mushy compromised state I told her “I love you too (Roller Girl)”.  Oh how the mighty tough are falling.  Some tough girl I am.  It’s been a weekend of emotions, bitter and sweet.  Yeah.. I’m feeling kinda mushy.

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