I needed that

Sometimes a quiet night is such a comfort.  It was a busy and hectic week and a work project I’ve been building to for months finally happened.  It was a big deal and I was freaked.  I wore a dress for the first time since 2002.  It was a dramatic day with so much going on I could barely think straight.

Last night was exactly what I needed.  I put it all aside.  I had a drink with Traveler and his wife and laughed about silly men’s underwear.  Then we got pizza to take back to my place to relax and play WoW.  I was keyed up at first, but I relaxed holding him and just doing all the things we like to do.  He was keyed up too and we decided to enjoy our evening.  I had little bouts of emotion here and there, feeling awful, ashamed, overworked, rejected, hurt, sad, scared, exhausted, fed up, just feeling just so many things about my week.  With each one though I breathed and thought of the here and now, of being here with him.  Of enjoying our evening as much as we could and we did.

We talked about everything and nothing and cracked each other up over WoW and pizza.  There was so much lovely restorative touch.  We slept like logs all spider monkeyed up.  I can’t describe the joy of sleeping with him, smelling his smell and feeling his skin.  I fell asleep in 30 seconds, lulled by his breathing.

In the morning things were clear and calm and good.  I talked him into breaking the healing period on my new piercing again to amazing effect, made us breakfast and spent some more time having fun in WoW.  Sometimes your days include all kinds of things that challenge you and hurt you and make you feel, and it’s nice when those nights are so restoring and good.

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