I’ve joked before about poly people and our love of Google Calendar. It’s true. I don’t think I know many poly peeps who don’t use the Google calendar. We have managed pretty well for a couple of years now with all our own separate calendars, Quinky Girl and Traveler, and Quinky Girl’s other partner Jonah, and me, and Cleveland, and whoever else is in the murder, but it’s just become time for Quinky Girl, Traveler, and me to share our calendars to help us plan better . Jonah (Quinky Girl’s other partner) shared his with her too, but I don’t see that one. We kept having difficult weeks with scheduling and miscommunications and mix ups and such. Things were lining up far worse than usual. So, we’re communicating and sharing info to plan better. Oh man is our calendar COLORFUL!
I’ve said before you can’t expect that you will always be able to schedule dates with “x” when “y” is on a date. I know many new poly couples try, but this is mostly crazy-making. You can TRY.. but you will also need to respect that sometimes it isn’t possible and be flexible and be good at entertaining yourself. Sometimes all of your partners are busy. And honestly, to be in any relationship a person has to be a whole person.
But.. well…making sure everyone sees everyone they love and gets the snuggles and the pets and the good times is a lot easier when people share schedules and communicate. So.. we shared our Google Calendars, Jonah and I to Quinky Girl and Traveler and them to us. Gulp. I know. It’s kinda… well.. it feels good. I had to laugh because I couldn’t read Traveler on this and tell what he felt about it. I asked him if he was okay with it and he said he was fairly convincingly, and it would make things easier. He kinda laughed at all of us being so damn complicated we needed to share calendars. Quinky Girl and I seemed amused I suppose, laughing about becoming Google Official and on the same day, within an hour of each other, getting our periods. Now that’s synced! We marked our calendars in blood.. muh ha ha ha ha!
I feel kinda good about it. It made me feel a little illicit at first, sending my whole calendar to Quinky Girl and Traveler. It was like opening up my panty drawer, or sharing my blog, or showing someone the contents of my purse. I mean, they pretty much know everything I do anyway, and I certainly don’t fear telling either of them way more personal things about me. But it felt like a step to openness or another step in sharing I guess. “This is what I am doing and have done with all of my time”. It wouldn’t make sense of course unless I shared the calendar that contained all the times I was busy or available, and that means all of my little appointments and my dates and plans and such.
I liked sharing. Again.. I know.. it’s not like I’m sharing stuff they don’t know or can’t know or whatever. It’s just sharing it in a more official and more organized and useful way. But it feels good. I can’t help it. I get to see and get to be considered on the family calendar, you know? It’s a little thing really, but I like little things. I collect them and cherish them. It feels good to note them. I like big things too.. but the little stuff is the stuff I pull out and handle.
Look at all the shiny, wonderful, cherished little things! I feel like a girl with a box brimming with tiny treasures. I picture an old cigar box with a beautiful lid and all these precious little things like a shell from the beach I had that great day on, and the best marble I’ve ever seen, and a chocolate kiss, and a rare baseball card, and a perfect piece of ribbon from the sweetest present, and a card of pictures from an old photo booth with my best friend, and a tiny elephant carved of old old wood. This may or may not be a super grand thing, but to me it’s special and I’m adding it to my box of lovely treasures.