Relationships. Oi Vey. We’re working out good things and it’s hard but good work. So, let’s just talk about sexy adventures instead. Except for this one thing… this one huge thing. Traveler did it again a few times now, talked about me as one of his two partners. He said it a couple of ways now. Holy shit holy shit holy shit. Happy. I’ve literally been smiling at random times just thinking about it. Now.. on to other stuff…
I met someone new,and I don’t wanna jinx it or read into it, so I’ll just say I’m excited. What is it? I dunno. What could it be? Not sure. But it’s fun to have hope.
As you might know, Traveler and I are entertaining sexy adventures with women. It’s been fun to dream and wish and fun to have a little play. We had some very nice sexy times with my friend and have some dreams about another friend who is also maybe a little interested. She and I talked about not wanting to muck up our beautiful budding friendship and reassured each other. I don’t know what that’ll be, but I’m hopeful. Aside from being cool as hell she’s so fucking sexy. And she and Traveler have mutual admiration too. Squee!
So I was thinking about threesomes, what I love about them and such. God I love threesomes. Clarification though. I love threesomes with a guy and two girls. I’ve never been able to have one with a girl and two guys (a.k.a. the devil’s threesome… heh). Something tells me I’d love it. I’ll get to that in a minute.
I love threesomes because of the variety of sensation, the doing and the having done. I love seeing my partner having pleasure in a way. I love being able to see his face as his cock is sucked. I love seeing the pleasure he gives. I love the ebb and flow and overwhelming sensation of being in the middle and of kicking back just for a moment while there is a moment with them. I love getting lost and coming to and diving back in. It’s wonderful.
I’m overcoming my difficulty with just admitting I’m interested and in flirting with women. I felt so guilty for wanting to fuck them with Traveler, so bad that a woman might feel I was treating her like a thing to be used, the way most couples treat me in their endless demanding emails. And I realized what I’m offering is lovely and right for the right person, but only if I offer it without a lot of pussy-footing. I don’t have some list of rules and some list of demands. I’d prefer we’d find a friend to explore a little with and we aren’t really open to a larger relationship or triad-like situation. That made me feel bad and then I realized.. duh.. there are LOTS of women who’d like that.. a respectful friendship and fun opportunity with two people that find them interesting and sexy. Shit. *I* would like that. It’s flattering to have people actually see and like you and want to have fun with you.
With a caveat. I don’t want to spend the night with a playmate at this juncture. I’m not saying I never would and in the right circumstance I could see that being nice. But I don’t like to spend the entire night and sleep with a new lover and I guess a sexy friend for Traveler and I is no different. So.. I’ll have to navigate that if we get lucky enough to have a fun evening with a woman again. I’m guessing I’ll just be honest and/or offer a ride home. It’s been forever since I navigated this stuff.
And about mmf situations.. well.. I’ve decided it’s a thing I want.
Most men are NOT into this. There are some lovely bi men, and that would rock. But I’ve found another way and another thing that greatly interests me. I talked for a bit a while back with a man who wanted to date a slutty woman, who wanted to see her with other men, share her with other men, and I cannot tell you how hot that idea is. He said to me once “I don’t just like you owning your sexuality and being a woman who can admit you love sex. I would like to hold your legs open and whisper in your ear how much I enjoy watching him fuck you”. Huzzah.
Jesus that gives me lady boners. I wiggle and writhe. It makes me insanely wet.
It didn’t work out with this guy for other reasons but the little dream he awoke didn’t die. It feels like an impossible dream and I’ve only recently admitted to myself that I would enjoy it. It feels like something akin to saying “I’d like to be a princess when I grow up”, to say out loud that I want this. But.. well.. I do. I’d like this man with my complimentary fetish to be someone I date and care about, and I think it’d be hottest in a relationship, but I could see it being a more casual sexy fun friendship too I suppose. We’ll see. I’m not proscribing it. I’m just putting out there in the universe that I’m interested in this. I know it’ll be rare. I know. But I can at least try can’t I? Why not at least take a shot?
I’ve pretty much ended my craigslist trolling. I found one really nice experience there and I’m not saying “never”, but well.. it was fun but I think it’s done. Shrug.
I’m already thinking of different kinds of sexy adventures.