Take a Leap

There are reports out now that Gonorrhea is on the rise in Washington (and everywhere else).  It’s up 40% here, health officials at the Washington Dept of Heath report.


A woman in a full body black rubber suit

A woman in a full body black rubber suit

Gonorrhea is the second most common STI in Washington, after Chlamydia.  The hardest hit demographic is young adults.  The rise is attributed to not using condoms and using them improperly, and the prevalence of unprotected oral sex.

So.. am I gonna stop having sex?  Uh. No.

There are two big errors of thinking that occur with something like this statistic.  One is that we all want to think that the bad things only happen to other people. “I’m 33 and that doesn’t apply to me” and “I was tested last year and so was my partner and we are good”, “I only sleep with educated white people” or “I’m in the NSPP and we are all poly and all safe”.  This is all NONSENSE.

Another main error is the thinking that we are immune because we take this or that safety measure.  “I use condoms with new partners” or “I ask people if they are tested” or “I go on a few dates with someone before anything happens and we always have ‘the chat'”.  This is also NONSENSE.  These are good things to do but they don’t equal immunity.  If you have sex you are taking a risk.

Gonorrhea and Chlamydia and HIV and HSV and Syphillis and all of the other things do not target people.  They are not caused by dirtiness or lesser college degrees.They do not stay in a little age group where they are MOST prevalent at the moment.  People of every age are getting Gonorrhea and Chlamydia in Washington.  The statistics are only saying that the group MOST effected is young adults.  According to the CDC’s STI factsheet 70% of new Gonorrhea and 63% of new Chlamydia infections occur in the 15-24 year old demographic.  This means that 30% of the new Gonorrhea and 37% of the new Chlamydia cases were people over 25.  So of the 2,860,000 Chlamydia cases and 820,000 Gonorrhea cases from a single year that were shown on the CDC’s site, a significant number of them were younger and a significant number were older than 25.  Being of a certain age is not an immunity.

Being tested last year or last week mean nothing.  My last test was in February or March, but I could easily have contracted an STI since then when I slept with Yarn Hooker or the new guy or played with my sexy friend in Idaho.  I discussed status with them, but they could have lied.. or not known they had caught an infection.  Traveler could have lied and had sex partners I don’t know about and gotten an STI.  I made out with a couple of people at a party.  I could have contracted something then.  Being tested or not tested is not a shield or a certainty.  It is simply a tool to say if anything was detected on that day, and giving me info to make decisions about risk.  Certainly people who care about their health and are tested and take certain measures are better risks in my book, but that’s not a certainty.  Having my test say “result a” on a given day only means I had result a on a test on that day.  It doesn’t say what I was exposed to since or still incubating at that time.

And as for sleeping or not sleeping with certain populations or races or professions or whatever… um.. poppycock.  EVERY kind of person can have an STI and if I sleep with a person who has an infection I can get that infection.

A couple pose side by side is black rubber suits with only their faces uncovered

A couple pose side by side is black rubber suits with only their faces uncovered

And as for my safety measures keeping me so safe.. well.. let’s look at that.

Do you use condoms for all skin to skin contact, not just penetrative but also oral and manual sex?  Do you do this every time?  Well, then you lower your risk significantly of some things, but it’s not zero.  Condoms break or have failures all the time.  They are 98% effective when used perfectly.  And condoms aren’t perfect protection for HSV and HPV either.

And oral sex is less of a risk?  Bullshit.  Look up new STI infections and oral sex.  Oral sex is very much NOT safe from STI’s.  If we wanted the risk to be significantly lower we would use condoms and barriers for all oral sex too.

And then there is how long and how well you know this person.  Did they disclose everything to you?  If they have a gaff will they totally tell you?  It is not just about trusting a person.  People that are good honest wonderful people lie to people that love them all the time because they are embarrassed or ashamed or don’t want to lose you or don’t want to hurt you or don’t wanna look bad.

There is no such thing as a get-out-of-jail-free card.  Sex is a risk.

We can lower risk with certain practices and lower it even more with others.  We can use condoms and barriers for every sexual contact and wash after each event and use gloves for things.  We can take prophylactic drugs to lower risk and ask to SEE results of people’s latest tests and get tested more often.  We can avoid or use barriers for variations of sexual practice or decide to have one partner or no partners.  We can even get a rubber suit thing to protect more.  No really.  They exist.

If we are sexual with other people we have some risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection.  So, we either decide to masturbate alone in a rubber suit or we determine our comfortable level of risk and accept that risk we feel is worth it. Then we test ourselves to make sure you treat anything we contract more quickly, since many infections have no symptoms.

Life is risky.  Planes fall from the sky and cars crash and sweet hearts are broken.  Condoms break and people twist their ankles and break bones while walking.  Life is messy and risky and things happen.  None of us is getting out alive. I guess I wanted to say all of this to kinda draw attention to looking at the reality of the situation and making informed choices about the risk you are willing to take.

I decided that tasting Yarn Hooker was worth the risk and I don’t regret it.  I don’t take that risk a lot, but she was worth it.  I might end up contracting an STI and I might not.  I accept that.  I do the best I can to make good choices and I choose to live with a small amount of risk sometimes. Holy shit is she worth it.  Seriously.. she’s delicious.  As is Traveler and the new man too.  I’m thinking of calling him Max.

I’m a lucky lucky lucky girl who gets to have wonderful sexy fun with a few rare people.  It carries a little risk but I’m as safe as I am willing to be while still being free enough to experience things with people that fascinate me.  And before I write a long and rambling thing about that, let me just give the highlights.

I came hard watching her ride his face as I rode him, and kissing her, feeling her moan in my mouth.  And I kissed his glistening face hungrily, tasting how sweet she was after.  It was one of many delights.  The night before, after he’d held me down and fucked me, we went again, and I swallowed him, loving every drop as he exploded in my throat.  We tied her to the bed and I swear to God I could have cum making her cum, watching her beautiful body and her sexy face as we played with her.  I unrolled the condom on him eagerly so she could ride with her abandon.  She is a revelation!  We smiled ourselves to sleep after our time with her.  And finally consummating a nicely slightly long flirtation, days later, Max talked dirty to me as he pounded me from behind, his hand wrapped firmly in my hair, exactly as I like, and we laughed so comfortably as I pet him afterward.  I wouldn’t want to miss that.  I would not have wanted to miss any of that.  I don’t pursue that many connections, but every now and then a really enticing connection and opportunity presents itself and I use barriers, always for penetration that isn’t with Traveler and often for oral that isn’t with him too.  And I don’t sleep with a lot of women and would happily use a barrier if I felt the risk warranted it.  I could be wrong at any time and I’d have to deal with it, and I will if or when it comes up.

All of the choices about this our valid.  It’s YOUR body.  Know your risks and act accordingly to your values and be honest with your partners about that, and in my book you are golden.  That’s just my two cents on a statistic.  Be careful out there guys, but have fun.


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