Today is the one year mark for Traveler and I. One year. Wow.
He started out as just a nice guy that offered to answer questions for me. I needed a friend. I got a friend, and a lot more.
I messaged him because he popped up in my matches and I was intrigued by his profile. I didn’t know how to start a conversation, so I just said he’d popped up and I was intrigued and I wasn’t sure how to start a conversation. He answered “I think you just did!”. We kibitzed back and forth, and I admitted I’d liked his interests and that he read to his wife. Something about that… a man that reads with his wife. It sounded like a guy who appreciated intimacy and like a man who knew how to treat women.
He was flirty but nice. He mentioned my caboose, but also wanted to know about the games I liked and how my trip to the Shakespeare festival had gone. We chatted back and forth for a few days, sharing tidbits and interests and finally I confessed that I was actually pretty exhausted from poly drama and wondered if he’d like to be friends. He responded that of course he’d be interested in just being friends, and that he’s been open a long time and could relate to drama stuff, and that if I’d like to talk he’d be happy to be a friend.
We chatted then on gmail, and arranged to meet and talk. He told me about his own difficulties with open relationships and was really thoughtful and kind. And dammit.. he was so damn cute. I remember seeing him for the first time like it was yesterday. He was wearing these nice pants and a purplish grayish shirt with just the collar unbuttoned. He smiled really warmly and was so welcoming and sweet, and ridiculously cute. I remember thinking that he was a little too cute for me and I was glad we’d decided to just be friends. He was so open and warm and generously shared some of his own really private struggles. I just liked him so very much. He was intelligent and kind and sexy. But we were just being friends.
Since it wasn’t a date, we got gyros and talked like old friends and then hit a poly meetup together, meeting my husband there. We were just friends, remember? Anyway.. the meetup was odd and afterwards we hugged goodbye. I sent him a message later that night or the next morning, and I thanked him for coming and for telling me such private stuff. It had really helped. He said, of course, “It was good to meet and talk with you. I had fun, even if it was a little hard not to flirt with you when you looked up at me that one way you do”. melt.
I hadn’t picked up on him being attracted to me. I guess I’m a little dull. I said I hadn’t even guessed. He said “well, you told me you needed a friend, so that’s what I was. I was trying to be respectful and I enjoyed your company.” melt melt.
I told him I’d changed my mind and I wanted to date him. Continue reading