Search Terms 4!

unicorn hunterPolyamory- I am glad people are searching this, and more and more all the time.  It’s the practice of multiple loving relationships.  There are a lot of configurations people take with this.  People in couples, triads, quads, moresomes.  There are couples always searching for that hot-bi-babe to date them both.  Ahh.. variety.  (Note.. the “unicorn” aka “hot bi babe” hunters are mostly new.  🙂

Nerdy Seattle Poly Posse, NSPP- This is a group of hot nerdy poly folks that have long threads that are generally jacked by talk of totally unrelated and entertaining things in a lair of awesomeness.  Many of them are kinky, or funny, or pedantic.  Eh… two outta three ain’t bad.  They have a zillion events and somehow, they let me in.  (happy skittery dance!)molly shannon

Making a life-There is something about the rebirth or the reinvention you go through after a big change.  I didn’t want to do this, but life’s like that sometimes and you don’t always get what you want.  Now, having said that.. I decided at some point to make use of the the good in the situation and rebuild.  I keep thinking of the 6 million dollar man intro.. we can build it stronger.. faster.. better.. we have the technology!  I don’t know about all that, but I know that I like the life I’m creating. I’m finding a lot of love, some great friendship, some adventure and comfort and fun.  I’m traveling and trying new things and exploring, and I’m keeping the good things and taking the lessons.  It’s hard and it’s sad.  There is really no way around that.  But it’s good too.  It’s actually really good.

VCH piercing/hood piercing –I have a few piercings now and I would like some more.  I have my cartilage in my ear, my nose, my nipples and a vertical clit hood.  They are pretty and some are functional.  My nipple piercings are slowly slowlybarbell healing and they’ve been really fun for some time now.  They are just so much fun.  The clit hood though, I have to admit, is pretty amazing.  It provides direct clitoral stimulation from a lot of fun stuff, like everything.  Um.. yes please.

I want to pierce my pussy –Then you should.  It’s wonderful.  I didn’t because “he” didn’t like them, and I regret that.  I especially regret that after months of verbal abuse and a sound dumping.  Now I have the vertical clit hood piercing and I plan to get 6 labia piercings too.  It’s my pussy and I’m gonna pierce it.  So fuck you.  (oh.. no.. not YOU)

Narcissistic Threesome Request –Say no.  Unless it’s with the Narcissist.  Mmmmmm.  Threesomes are best with a little genuine affection and trust and connection and/or with a whole lotta passion.  Have a threesome because YOU want to and the people you are with want to and never for any reason other than that.

morgan freeman talking in sleepWhy is Morgan Freeman’s voice so amazing –I think I answered this, but what the hell.  It’s amazing because it’s clear and silky and deep.  It sounds wise and at the same time warm and welcoming.  It’s a caramelly goodness.

kropserke leelooPoly girl blog –You found it.  I’m a poly girl and this is my blog.

Poly chic blog – you found it.  I’m a poly chick.  Yes I am fine with the term chick too even if I’m a feminist.  I’m an old school feminist.  That means I was one before it was a super bad word.

Polycamp 2013 –It was really fun.  It was in Millersylvania park and have camping, workshops, skinny dipping (oops!), games, food and fun.  My little murder (minus 1) went and had a great time.

Bandage sex –it’s been a while since this led you folks here.  I wrote a post about sex as a bandage and balm.. or a comfort.  And you know… it is.

When fisting, how far can you push your arm? –She’s not a cow and you aren’t pulling out a calf.  She has a cervix that will stop you or should stop you.  Let her push against you more than you push against her to avoid hurting her cervix.  Basically though.. just to the wrist.

Fisting shaking –is this like Sanford and Son’s dad shaking his fist at the world?  Or Homer Simpson?  Or is it about the lovely shaking of a nervous system after mind-blowingly amazing orgasms from a fisting?  Stop making that face.  It’s awesome and no… my pussy is not at all roomy.sanford

Casualthreesomes –it’s like a formal threesome with less pomp and circumstance.  Just kidding.  Of course you can have casual threesomes.  I’d try swing clubs maybe?  I’ll let you know.  I’m hitting my first this weekend.

Bah sex -You m’dear are having the wrong kind of sex.  Sex is lovely.  If yours is bah, then try new stuff.  Experiment.  Read and watch things online.  Do not consult Cosmo.  Play and find what you like.  Get a little weird.

Frog shut up i’m still talking –I believe what you were looking for is Risperidone. frog riding beetle  How Do You Rebuild Chondroblast? –Aww.  I’m sorry you wound up here you nice scholarly soul.  You were looking for a nice thing about healing bone and found a post (click that for a link) I wrote about healing from a heartbreak.  I’m kinda proud of that one though, so I’m secretly pleased..

tentacleJapanese Favorite Porn –I think it’s called Hentai,  and it’s catching on here too.  In a recent survey a few states had it in their top 3 porn searches and requests. Tentacle porn.  Weird.

Polyamory dating –It’s like regular dating except with more people, more safe sex discussions, more discussions in general, more OK Cupid.com, and more scheduling, often with Google Calendar.busy calendar

 My favorite porn –I don’t have any porn here or know your favorite.  My favorite porn does not necessarily indicate my real life attractions.  My favorites are sex machines, gang bangs, electrical play, submissive stuff, anal, amateur, and real lesbian and gay porn, and male masturbation.  I prefer movies.  I like some erotica writing but usually search more for movies.  Most of my favorites are favorites because they look more real.  I like when people stop looking pretty and look like they are fucking.

Sexblogging –I blog about sex here a lot.  I blog about love and relationships too.  Yep.  Sex.  Love.  Relationships.

Open relationship blog – I blog about open relationships mostly.

Boyfriend fucked –mm… I like fucking my boyfriends.

bride kick groom

Character defective husband –Heh.  Yeah.  I had one of those.  Eh.  I’m not perfect either.  Letter to a Traveler –I wrote a letter to Traveler a short while ago.  I was all open-hearted and mushy.  I felt like a total tool and sent an apology for it a day later thinking it must have come off as pretty weird.  He replied that it was a really nice email and I secretly vowed not to ever do that to myself again.  EEK.  Being a big old expressive mush monster sucks.  I’m not a fan of vulnerable.  Being out there is the breeze blows little dogs.

unicorn 2Okcupid pollys dream – A single poly girl’s ad that says she loves couples and doesn’t say she is really too busy to date?

Sexy mishaps –These are funny.  I did a blog about them and meant to add more and never did.  The most recent one was when I used a cock ring and then accidentally snapped him in the balls really hard with it when I was trying to take it off.  Whoopsie!

screaming-manName something you’d be excited about spotting in the ocean –Seriously.. HOW is this still bringing a bunch of people here and why are they searching for that anyway?

Epic sex date –I can’t pick one.  I really can’t.  I am honestly the luckiest chick on the planet.

Used cld cunts –I am not dignifying that.  Tool.

Watches him get massage –I’d do it.  I like the idea of watching my boyfriends do a lot of sensual and sexy things or doing them with them.  I like to watch and be watched.

Relationship escalator –This is a really cool blog post by someone vastly more talented than I.

Polyamory groups –Your best bets to find these is by looking them up on meetup.com in your area or checking with your local sex positive club or whatever.  I’d also try searching for your city’s name and the word polyamory.  If all that fails, find something in your town that is firefly or doctor who related.  Yeah.  They’ll be there.  deviant art firefly Men who don’t sow oats –Non-farmers it is!  Just kidding.  There are lots of guys who don’t really do the whole sowing oats thing.  There’s lots of guys who crave relationships and connection and such and are NOT into sowing type stuff.  If you want that, then say so.

Whole hand fisting –is there another kind?

Why cant i stick my hand all the way in when fisting?–Use lube.  Get her really excited.  Keep her really excited.  Play..and maybe even get her to come a bit before you try to push in.  Help her relax and then push.  It may take a few times.  It’s okay.   A fisting attempt is as lovely as a fisting success.  It fits.  I swear it does.

Sticking needle nipple -Piercing?  Needle play?  I’m down.

Fuck cheaters –No thanks.  YOU fuck cheaters.  I’ve worked too long and hard to be open and honest than to give it up now.  I’ve NEVER been down with OPP, and never felt good about anything that violated that.

Crazyclickdating -Umm?

burning manCamping Sexparty –I get the impression that Burning Man style events are like that.

Wives fucking in Seattle –I would generally prefer my wife put out too.

I fucked all my boyfriends friends –If It was consensual I am in total support.  Did he watch?  I like slutty.slut

How can I fuck my boyfriend good ? –Ask him.  He might tell you.  Tell him some stuff you like to “prime the pump”.  Maybe even ask while you’re both turned on.

Why does my boyfriend think he really sounds like Morgan Freeman? –Because  he either does or he’s delusional?

Wow chick.com –I’ve never heard of it.  No idea how it got you here.

Where can i find websites about BDSM? You are a creep –What a weird search and weird that you ended up here.  I am not a creep.  I do have some BDSM stuff here.  Welcome.

Is cheating pretty much fucking? –Depends who you ask.  I think you can cheat without fucking.  I think cheating is about lying and sneaking and intent and that kind of betrayal can be accomplished without sex, in my book.

Dating podcast Seattle –Yay!  I do have some dating podcast posts on here.  I hope you liked them!

podcast

Hungarian you can use

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Budapest is home to 1.7 million people, many of them little cunts. And a lot of those little cunts play with dolls. Just saying’

Talking with Cleveland, I asked if he knew the Hungarian word for pussy.  I’m classy.  What can I say?  I always ask when I hear you know a  language other than English.  He’s Hungarian.  He thought a moment and said “I never learned the word for pussy”.

I was incredulous.  He’s a native speaker!  What do you mean?  He said “my mom never told me the Hungarian word for pussy”.  Well.. sure.  That makes sense.  I asked him for the word for vagina.  He didn’t know that either.  I asked what his mom called it and he said she just never referred to it.  People are strange.  Can you imagine never referring to a vagina?  I asked, “you never even had to talk about like.. not kicking little girls in the vagina?”  That cracked me up.  Thinking about that later, it cracked me up that this was my example, as though this is something naughty little boys are always doing.

So.. I looked up the Hungarian words for pussy.  Hilarious.  Read the description.

——–
Pina- vagina, pussy.  I wouldn’t use it in a Biology class.
Picsa -Cunt.  Note, VERY offensive, unless used among friends or qualified by “kis” as in “kis picsa” (little cunt) which may refer endearingly to a little girl.
Punci -(noun) Pussy. Note, A playful name of vagina. Also means girl.

Oh.. little cunts are made of sugar and spice and everything nice…

Cleveland said “I have a deeper appreciate for the language.  It’s either really open-minded or just plain misogynistic”.  Awesome.  :-P

Sexy Mishaps!

Had those times during your sexy times that you gaffed and then laughed and laughed!?  Me too!  I figured I’d share a couple of funny gaffs in my sexy times and see if you’d share some of yours too.

I got this idea from the comments of a reader on one of my other posts.

I need a laugh, so I’ll show you mine.  Will you show me yours?  The following are injuries, scars, oops and whoops while having sex.  Good times!

1) My first is the explanation of a scar.  A dude named Tremaine (strapping Canadian fellow) has a scar right between his eyes that I accidentally gave him.  See, I was giving him head in my living room while my roommate was asleep.  I was really getting into it and he was really getting into it and we were kinda feeding off of each other.  It got pretty heated.  He was grabbing the carpet below him and grabbing around a little.. his body responding.. then he got stock still for a bit and I stopped and looked up.. his face was COVERED in blood.  He said “what.. oh man.. keep going…”.  I must have looked horrified because he suddenly seemed to realize he was bleeding and checked it with his fingers and realized his condition.  I jumped up and grabbed his shirt and was just pressing it to his head when my sleepy roommate entered and then screamed.  Apparently in our fervor we’d knocked over this tall wooden giraffe statue thing and the muzzle had hit him right between his eyes.  It had made a racket neither of us had noticed.  He’d known he was hit and it had hurt, but he’d been really liking that head.. so.. he’d kinda recovered.  The funniest part was that we were both still naked and laughing about this with my roommate for a minute before my roomy and I noticed his dick swelling.. looking at her and then me..

My roomie huffed, spun on her heel and stalked off.  I laughed.  “Wrong answer there hero.”  Dang.. I have to run.. well.. I’ll comment with more later.  Show me yours!!!

Search Terms Again!!

So, these are the terms people searched to find me.  I deleted a few I’ve already addressed in previous search terms posts.  I hope you like them.

You mateimages

No, you mate.  I don’t really have sex on command.  Okay.. sometimes I do, for very special people.  🙂

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