Ouch! Beauty is Pain

lipstickToday was the second full day post genital piercings and um.. ouch.  The swelling and bruising is going down, but damn they are sensitive today.  I have this alien part of my brain that sometimes looks at stuff we humans do and thinks about it in wonder.

Women will sometimes go to great lengths to eat all organic and work out and avoid all of these things like BPA (which isn’t actually proven to be any kind of concern unless you boil things in plastic and then drink them) and then smear lots of chemicals on their lips and spread chemical nightmares with bat guano on their eyelashes.  The same women buy all silicone sex toys for safety and then slather them in chemicals to insert them into their vaginas.  People do crazy things.

People do crazy things like pay others lots of money to shove huge 10g needles through their labias and insert steel rings for beauty and sexual enhancement.  Yikes. Yeah. Today I’m feeling that.  I still love them and I’m still glad I did it and I waited a LONG time to make it happen, but yeah.. today the alien brain has much to contemplate.

The alien brain runs wild until I look at my gleaming rings, or until I step from the shower and feel their gentle weight and the way they make me aware of my warm and sensitive labia.  Then I get wet.  And then they hurt.  And I clean them and they ache a little in a not-so-good way (unless you come kiss me).

10g needleI’m glad I did it, but yeah.. today is a day when I just can’t stop thinking about the old phrase that always made me laugh- “beauty is pain”.  I scoffed at that.  I, who won’t wear uncomfortable clothing to be fashionable, who won’t spend an hour each morning doing my hair and make-up as so many women do, who refuses to dress up most of the time because it’s so damn uncomfortable, and who wears my comfy keen shoes almost every day almost all the time.  I scoff at a sexy sexy scratchy pair of panties and a stiff push up bra and daily hair rituals and 15 kinds of make-up.. and then I shove steel skewers through my genitals.  Yeah.  It’s healthy to scoff at yourself sometimes.

They’re beautiful and I love them, but today beauty is pain.



So much has been going on.  I’ve been having outrageous fun and enjoying a few happy accidents.  And I finally pierced my pussy.

holiday piercingTraveler and Quinky Girl were not able to go to Traveler’s Family’s annual celebration.  That is very sad for them, as they love his family and he has NEVER missed a Christmas with them.  After a bit of commiseration though, we made something wonderful out of something sad.  And the something wonderful is the biggest most wonderful gift I got this season.  I had time with my loves!  Traveler and I enjoyed a holiday burlesque that was the most professional and beautiful burlesque either of us have seen.  Tremendous food and tremendous wine, and dancing and boobs and comedy and song. Wonderful!  It was insanely expensive, and cost way more than I’d planned.  But I’ll recover financially and he’s worth it.

And then Traveler and I and Quinky and Jonah and Jonah’s other partner and gussied up in medieval garb and hit a yule feast in Camden for Christmas Eve.  (funny, right?)  And on Christmas I spent the morning (after waking up excessively late) over a nice brunch opening presents before going to my dear old friend’s family Christmas.  Her family is terribly sweet, and welcomes me for the holidays.  I don’t have any family and am usually alone on the holidays, so this is INCREDIBLY appreciated and generous of them.  I didn’t stay super long because I’d hoped to help make the holidays nice with Traveler and Quinky Girl, who were missing their family, but even a little conversation and some hugs and the time with my friend lamenting her (nearly perfect) feast felt like home.  And then I had the juiciest, most flavorful, most tender and delicious tenderloin I’d ever tasted.

I loved that we ended up talking about real things around the table, eating wonderful food and talking about Quinky making a big decision.  It’s something when the people you love honor you by getting real about deep shit.

There has just been such good time.  I have to admit the holidays generally make me sad.  It’s hard to try to plan enough and to bolster myself during the holidays.  I’m lucky enough to have found my family, and it’s hard to be apart from them over the holidays.  But this year was wonderful.  Baking cookies with my loves and my kittens, running around ragged getting everything done, washing so many dishes with my days of cookie baking I have perma dish-pan-hands.  And I loved it.

And then today…

I finally realized a dream I’ve been planning for forever.  I got my beautiful labia rings.  There’s never a super great time to stab your pussy, and to wait for it to heal for almost a month for anything about about 3 months for tougher things.  Traveler helped me out and sent me off with a “till we meet again” passion, and then he came with me. Continue reading

Learning Stuff

If you pay attention, you’re always learning stuff about yourself and those you love.

I’ve learned some stuff lately.

  • Sometimes people seem at first like they have a lot of common interests, but when you talk to them more.. these are really superficial matches and sometimes not even that, so a bit of time gabbing can be useful.
  • I don’t like “princess” girls, stupid girls, girls who are wildly unsafe sexually, girls who have really strong feelings about piercings needing to be delicate to be beautiful, or girls that have ridiculously foofy dogs they dress in dresses and pose on pink couches.  clit.. shriveling.
  • Traveler has WAY looser standards for some sorts of dating partners than I do.
  • My job site does in fact somehow manage (even with the longest and most ridiculous hiring process ever) to hire crazy and dumb people and I don’t wanna sleep with them.
  • green bra 2I like requests to take naughty picture sets with my lovers and my pussy is rather nice from that angle.  Mmmm.
  • Piercings are very photogenic.
  • I can get the piercings I’ve wanted for months and months and months and use nylon space holders when I have surgery.  Piercings back on the table!
  • My pussy needs labia rings.
  • Traveler and I both want and like a certain sex act we didn’t know the other liked.  Yay for threesome talks where the sexual interest isn’t into it but we realized we both are!  So much fun to explore!
  • Chemistry and intensity can grow and grow and grow.
  • incontinence pads are actually really soft and absorbent and sexy and it’s sooooo nice to sleep on a clean dry bed after beautifully gushing to hot hot sex.
  • I like threesomes and would like more of them.
  • Being stood up by a woman you were uncertain of while you are having a very fun conversation with your boyfriend is pretty cool actually.
  • You should not make big judgements at 4 am after reading  a surprise email that wasn’t super fun.  Spinning about it for a while later in the morning, also before eating and getting centered, is also ill-advised.
  • I value transparency and being informed when it comes to my partners.  Things that feel like they were sneakily done feel like secrets and wig me out.  I feel safest when I feel informed.
  • I LOVE collaborating in love in even more ways and it’s wonderful to be able to plan around your loves getting time together when you can.
  • I want her and she’s not attainable, and that is okay.
  • Rob Roy on 2nd Avenue has delicious old-fashioneds.
  • Sometimes sexy girls from OKC DO like me back.
  • Talking so wonderfully with sexy girls for hours is great foreplay.
  • Making out and getting a woman mostly naked in my new car is a lot easier than in my mini.
  • I think it’s hot when she forgets an article of clothing in my car.
  • Talking absolutely filthily to sexy girls while making out makes them deliciously wet… deliciously wet.
  • Sometimes sexy girls think your boyfriend is hot and would entertain some lovely naughty fun with them.  Yay for threesomes back on the table.
  • Warm and wonderful dates that flow from sleepily snuggling to sleepy sex to again sleepily snuggling are HOT.
  • I can’t wait to make pies with my loves and then EAT PIES with my loves!


This one has a lot of talk about piercings and a fantasy with one of my loves, so skip this one if you like.  😉

leather cuffs, can be bought from amazon.

leather cuffs, can be bought from amazon.

(Amazon Link to Leather Blindfold) <- click here.

(Amazon Link to Leather Cuffs) <- click here.

So Traveler and I fished the same girl.  It was bound to happen, but we both started talking to her on the same day (yesterday) and about many of the same things, sharing very similar interests.  And holy fuck. I’m getting my piercings as soon as I get back from my weekend away.  I don’t care and I can’t wait.

I told this girl, Threes we’ll call her, about the piercings I wanted and we got all worked up talking about it because she’d found me via my answers about piercing questions.  She shares my interest.  And when I told her how I’d been planning for MONTHs to get them this month and that I was totally crestfallen to put them off because of surgery in a few months she said “why don’t you just do it and get nylon piercings to hold the holes while you do surgery?  Eureka.

I’m getting them ASAP.  I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT!  All those months of planning and dreaming and thinking about them and all the porn and pictures and imaginings.  Growl.  Yes!

And oh god I have a fantasy.

It’s graphic.  You were warned.  Do not read this is fantasies about me and my loves would be at all upsetting.  Continue reading

Piercing It

A while back, shortly after Great Date and I broke up and Hubby and I decided to divorce, I decided I would get piercings.  I’d long wanted nipple piercings, but Hubby didn’t really care for them, so I’d held off.  In the aftermath of our marriage, thinking about all kinds of things great and small that I might want to do with myself, piercings and tattoos came up.  I already have a number of tattoos and would like more.  I decided to pierce my nipples and get a vertical hood piercing.  Nipples take forever to heal, but it is an investment of time I suppose.  They are a lot more sensitive and I like my breasts a lot more now.  I’ve always like stimulation to my nipples, and it’s just a lot more interesting now.  I never really liked my breasts, the way they looked, and I think they are cuter now.  They are about 9 months old and I think nearly healed.  The painful healing part was fast, but you have to be careful with them, not to pull on them too much for a good long time to allow them to fully heal properly.


Beautiful woman with facial piercings found at: http://crunchmodo.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/body-piercings.jpg

I went back a short while later and got that vertical hood piercing, and that my friends, that was a damn good idea.  It might be my favorite body modification ever.  I had an orgasm in the grocery store walking down an aisle while it healed.  The crazy amazing sensitivity went away for me in about 2 weeks or so, which was actually a good thing.  The hardest part for me on the healing was not messing with it.  Every time I got excited I could feel my clit stimulated by the bar as it swelled in my hood and I got wet.  That’s not super convenient.  It become a tortuously sexy feedback loop.  Random thought- swelling- clit stimulated by the bar- more excited- wet- very aware of my own excitement and utterly unable to do anything about it… wah. Continue reading

Verticle Hood Piercing? Yes please!

I pierced my clitoral hood on Monday and today was the first day I played with it at all.  a m a z i n g.  I would give it as Christmas gifts to every girl on every list.  Wow.

So, piercing the clitoral hood is really simple and relatively painless.  There is this thin skin that comes down over the clit and they stick a small curved bar up in the opening between the clit and it and pierce a hole the bar comes out of at the top.  There is a ball at the end of the bar, resting on top of the clip, and a smaller one outside of the hole in the hood.

I can’t describe it, but huzzah!

It’s still a tiny bit sore (NOTHING like the nipples which hurt very little here and there, and NOTHING like my ears which hurt way way worse.  The healing on the nipples sucks, but the hood healing is really fast.  It’s just this thin skin and it’s a piece of cake.

But still.. it’s only been a few days, so we took it easy.  Cleveland touched the little balls on the piercing with the very lightest of touches, gently tickling it with feather like fingers and the texture of my panties sliding across the balls was sensational.  It felt like my clit was enormous and made of titanium and being vibrated.  I came and came and came and begged him to stop and then begged some more because he was really enjoying his new toy.  After I calmed a good long time he used his hand some more, discovering how various parts of my pussy pulled or vibrated my clit hood.  Wow.

The thing is that part of the clit lies in the root to it and this entire length and the clit itself is stimulated by the tiny curved bar against it and the pretty balls on it.  An entirely new part of my clit is very very very very happy.  I’ve been pretty damn orgasmic for years, but this is ridiculous.  I actually kinda hope it calms down a little.  Poor Cleveland had to peel me off of the ceiling.

You Wanna Stick a Needle in WHAT!?!?

I think I’m having a midlife crisis.  Or maybe it’s that thing  you go through when you are getting divorced from your decade long relationship and you are an adult with no one to weigh in.

I’m getting my pussy pierced.

Two months ago I got my nipples pierced. I learned about how they affect sensation and wanted them.  I waited because Traveler’s other lovers had piercings and I didn’t want to be like everyone else.  I waited because my husband didn’t really like them and my other boyfriend sort of disliked them, and suddenly sans Great Date and Hubby I thought.. fuck that.  I’m getting what I want.  Who cares if Traveler dated a girl that had them.  That can’t be a reason I can’t have them too.  I love to have my nipples played with and piercings really enhance that sensation.  I had never gotten them because of the prohibitively long healing time.  It can take about a YEAR for them to fully heal.  Then I learned how they increased sensation and how much fun they could be sexually, and that you could begin playing with them relatively quick and just had to hold off on the rough stuff…  Um.. sign me up.

ImageI like the rough stuff, but with piercings it takes less, and I see it as an investment of time in pleasure.

It’s been really easy.  The first one didn’t even hurt to pierce and the second one I swear hurt less to pierce than my ears.  I forget them most of the time.  I had a little reminder this past weekend with a relatively minor mishap, but overall I couldn’t be happier.  You still can’t pull or twist  them because they are still healing after all, but they almost never hurt  and you can pinch and lick them and holy guacamole does that send me.  For maybe the first time in my life I like my breasts.  They are so cute.  I have little barbells in them with little silver balls.  I am looking for cuter ends now.

So… now I’m piercing my pussy.  More accurately I’m getting my clitoral hood pierced.  I heard of women piercing their clitoris and how they could lose all sensation and immediately rejected any sort of vagina piercing as crazy.  Oops.  I believed a wives’ tale.  Piercing the clitoris is exceedingly rare and not done at reputable shops.  What they pierce is the hood, or fleshy skin over the clit or in some cases pierce under the clit in what they call a triangle piercing.  Both of these are meant to stimulate the clit with direct and indirect stimulation to the area.  Meaning- when you have sex it makes the ball on the bar or ring stimulate the front of the clit (the hood piercing) or the back (triangle piercing).  You can of course play with it directly too to some pretty fun effect.  Not only are they cute… they’re little orgasm helpers.  Yay.

It’s also a total myth that you’ll lose all clitoral sensation.  I checked.  It’s a myth.

Also, because this skin is so thin it’s relatively painless to pierce and heal and it heals wicked fast.  You can play with it in days (with a little care) and it’s completely healed in about 4 weeks.  Huzzah!  That, and it’s really cute.  I don’t want to get nailed as an adult blog and censored, so I’ll let you discover this yourself on Google.  Look up “vertical hood piercing”.  Cute huh?

Now, it’s just the matter of when to do it.   I’d like to plan it to affect as few dates as possible.  I’m thinking Sunday.  If I get it later on Sunday I should be healed enough for gentle fun by midweek.  Cleveland seemed pleased and satisfied to learn that he could at least lick the area very very quickly.  (See why he’s amazing?)  And Traveler is a piercing enabler from way back.  He is letting me perv on his pics to get ideas for jewelry and piercings I might like.  So helpful.  Heh heh heh.

ImageIt’s kind of a sexy time for me.  I think I’m also going to get bangs cut in my hair.  Yep.  It might be a midlife crisis or a divorcing detour, but whatever.  I am excited about my shiny new membership to the kink club, and my newly pierced nipples.  I’m going to love my beautiful pussy piercing too.  I can’t wait to try it out.


***correction- I am going to a polycamp at the end of this month and want to be able to swim and canoe and stuff, so I’m waiting until after that.  Sigh. ***

Lovely so Far

I’m working on a big old post but it’s slow going, gathering research and quotes and formulating what I’m saying and it’s just too pretty out today for that kinda of thing.  Instead I’ll just gush a little.  Heh.. gush.


It looks way worse than it feels. Really.

So I had my much anticipated and minorly feared overnight with Cleveland and a really restorative date with Traveler.  I’m spending a good deal of time these days with friends and thinking about things, such as what I want and what I need and what the hell to do with my marriage.  But I’m also enjoying things and relaxing.  It’s nice to have a breather.  Continue reading