What to ask Traveler?

Traveler and I will finally record a podcast we planned long ago. The podcast is coming back retooled!

What would you like to ask Traveler? He will reserve the right not to answer anything he doesn’t want to, so feel free to ask anything at all.

That’s right! Traveler finally speaks. Help me know what to ask him.


If it helps bring up questions… He has been open for 14 or so years, and in love with two women for 3 years, and previously for a couple of years. He’s had three open loving committed relations at a time. He is friendly with the men his wife and I date. He’s very rarely jealous. And he’s hardly ever sick at sea. (Kidding)

Also, interestingly, both his wife and I are poly bloggers, and he does not identify as poly though he and Quinkygirl are very much in love and together nearly 15 years and he says he’s madly in love with me and we’ve been together 2 years and 8 months. His wife and girlfriend are very very close and love each other. He’s incredibly loving, great in bed, and a deeply good confidant. Curious? Ask stuff!

Slutty Girls and the Men Who Love Them- The latest Non-Mono Cast

Sexy lady found at singaporestoriesbyrya

The latest Non-Monocast Podcast posted.  It’s called Slutty Girls and the Men Who Love Them.  It’s Non-Monocast number 17.

It’s kinda fun.  It’s about my recent epic threesome as my first time swinging!  Yes!  And it’s about slutty girls, and fun, and gushing, and talking about it all, and men who love slutty girls.  Listen to it for free here.

Woman striking a pose on a settee found at pinterest.

Bawdy Storytelling

BawdyAwesome NEWS!!!!!!!!

One sec.  I’ll get to it.  I went to the first ever Bawdy Storytelling in Seattle last night.  It was AWESOME.  I’ve never been to Bawdy and I’m a total convert.  I got to put faces with the names Reid Mihalko, Midori, Rachel Lark, Dixie De La Tour, and John Woods of the Wetspots.  I also saw/met new faces like Pamela Madsen and fed my fan-girldom of Dan Savage.  Wet Personal Lubricants helped fund the event and it was held at Re-Bar.

It was so fun!  Seattle-ites screaming their heads off and laughing and celebrating sex.  Such good times.

I’ll get to the great news in a minute I promise.  They’re having another bawdy tonight where Seattle folks can tell stories and I’m missing it for the super excellent reason that Cleveland and I are off on our anniversary trip.  It’s been a year today.  🙂

Maybe some time I can get up there and tell a story.  That’d be so cool.

And now the news…. Reid Mihalko said he’d be on our podcast!!!!!  Can you fucking believe that.. our little podcast.  So cool.  That guy is the fucking coolest.

Wet Personal Lubricants – Your Place Or Mine?

Bawdy Storytelling Facebook

Reid Mihalko’s Page

Life on the Swingset!

swingset logoI’m in!!!  They are letting me submit contributions!

I have long been a fan of “Life on the Swingset”, the podcast.  It led me to “Pedestrian Polyamory” the podcast and to abiding crushes on pretty much the entire cast of both podcasts.  Talking with other open/poly/swinger folks it seems I am not alone in this.  After a while I checked out their website, and I’m a fan of that too.  It has great blogs and info.

I think when I first opened up I was so hungry for information about how to navigate all of this heady adventure, and so amazed to find that there was a broad community out there figuring this stuff out too.  I also enjoyed Dan Savage’s “Savage Lovecast” and Minx’s “Polyamory Weekly”, and Sex Nerd Sandra’s podcast.  I love learning and I often go on jags when I discover great new things to learn.  I read “Sex at Dawn”, “SM 101”, “Opening Up” and “The Ethical Slut”.  I read websites and scoured the net.

I started this blog during this phase, needing a place to talk about all the things that were happening because the only open people I knew were the people I was dating.  Over time I found community with local meet ups and munches and slowly came out everywhere but at work.

Anyway.. long story summed up, I became a fan-girl of some of the people blogging and writing and podcasting about all of this stuff and I’m insanely honored to say that I’ll be submitting posts to contribute to Life on the Swingset’s blog community.  I’m writing my bio and my first post.  I can’t believe it.  I am very excited.  I think I’ve read the email from Miko the Techogeisha something like 90 times.  I can’t believe she said she and Cooper are already familiar with this blog.  Wow.  Wow.  Wow.  I shouldn’t be surprised.. I mean.. they are people.  They are people like me who are figuring this stuff out too.  Part of what I love about the people I so admire in this community is that by and large they all seem to be still learning too.  They have a lot to share, and part of that is their own journeys with this stuff and the ways they learn and change over time.  This little old blog has a wider reach that I understand sometimes.

I’m 3 people shy of 600 subscribers.  And I am constantly in awe of this.  I know by blog standards this is still relatively small, but I am deeply deeply humbled.  I hope I can contribute something useful and I hope I can add to the community of voices out here.  It’s like anything though, right?  I’m not a learned pro.  What I can add that is really valuable and really unique to me is my experiences.  I’ll try not to state tooooo many opinions though I will share some.  I’ll try to share experiences as I can, and I’ll try not to embarrass anyone but me.  It took a few days to inform my little murder.  We’re submitting to Life on the Swingset!!!  Booya!

Podcast 15 – Get Real


This free podcast is about what happens after the afterglow and when people are being real.  Cleveland and I talk about breaking the seal, deal breakers and what happens when relationships aren’t so “polite” any more.  

Listen to it here.  

or cut and paste this to your browser window: http://blog-vec-com-podcast.s3.amazonaws.com/seattle-poly/2014-05/015-Get-Real.mp3


Hear it free on your computer or smart phone or whatever.  🙂

Also, if you area  musician and would like to make us a little intro, or you are a person and want to suggest a title the the podcast, please do!  Thanks. 


Podcast 14 – Word Search

Here is Podcast 14 – Word Search.

Click HERE to listen

hostage negotiation

It’s about how we poly folk are always saying communicate communicate communicate, but we don’t always say HOW to learn to communicate.  We talk about resources, share ideas and learned lessons and talk about talking.  Oh, how polyamorous of us!!


Resources we talked about:

Reid’s Elevator Speech

Center for Non-Violent Communication

CNVC Feelings Inventory

Childrens List of Feeling Words

Psychlogy’s Today- Active Listening Techniques of Hostage and Crisis Negotiations

Polyamory Weekly Podcast – Owning Your Own Shit, by Cunning Minx – a podcast

Savage LoveCast with Dan Savage – a podcast

 Books on Amazon-

non violent communicationNonviolent Communication: A Language of Life  $11.27 on Amazon and available with free shipping.





opening upOpening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships $11.83 on Amazon with free shipping.

Podcast 13 – Get Quinky!

On the podcast, this episode 13, we “Get Quinky”!  We interview and out Traveler’s other partner as the sexy poly blogger girl, Quinky Girl of blogspot.  Download it or stream it on your computer, tablet, or phone for free.  Listen to it here.


We talk about polyamory, PTSD, kink, metamours, open marriage, long term poly, polyaffective relationships, courtly love, jealousy, insecurity and more.  🙂

And Quinky’s blog is here.

Books We Talked About:

The Polyamorists Next Door: Inside Multiple-Partner Relationships and Families by Elisabeth Sheff

The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment by Jack Morin

PodCast 12 – Inside/Outside

Inside/Outside.. the Podcast.  It’s episode number 12, and Cleveland and I talk about all about inclusiveness, integration, and other fancy words for making less compartments and boxes for the people we love.  It’s about mixing it up.  It’s about getting it all together.  It’s about Ohana.  It’s about family and connection.  It’s about this and that.  It’s cake and eating it too.  It’s about the murder.  Awwwww.. yeah….

Listen to it here. 


Back to Life, Back to Reality

“back to life, back to reality
back to the here and now yeah
show me how decide what you want from me
tell me maybe i could be there for you
how ever do you want me how
how ever do you need me

show me how decide what you want from me
tell me maybe i could be there for you”   Soul II Soul.

It is finally the end of the dread December.  Traveler and his wife are home.  Cleveland and his wife are home.  Boss is enjoying some excellent time alone with his sweetie and not able to make a date yet, but soon.  The couple I befriended and miss dearly are nearly home.  My Canadian friends (Texdom and Fishnet) are home.  Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..  I’m so glad December is almost over.  December has made me really grateful for my normal life.  December made me very hungry for time, for affection, and for the sweet ministrations of my loves.

Why is December such a cluster?!?!?  Anyway.. it’s the salad days of catching up.  Continue reading

Podcast 11- Peach's Inquisition

We’re doing a little multi-part podcast where we interrogate the members of our little Murder (aka polycule… aka people we are dating and they are dating).  First up is Peaches, boldly submitting to our questions and here for your listening pleasure.  She talks all about the murder, dating poly and mono, how she came to this, and how she does this.  It’s Peaches!

Listen to it HERE.

interrogation5(yes.  click the little aqua word that says “here” to link to it.)

(it’s free)

(yes it will play on your computer or phone automatically)